The Kiltartan wonder book

Well, I will tell you the story of a Mule was in the world one time, says the old man who had promised me a codfish and had only brought me a hake.

There were three sons of a King that had died, and they were living together, and there was a stable and a bird, and one of the sons was a bit simple. The bird used to be coming to the stable every morning and to be singing sweetly, and they all three fell in love with it and used to be trying to take it, but they could not. But one day the one that was a bit simple, that they called the Fool, took the tail off it. The bird said to him then: ‘You must follow me now until you find me;’ and it went away, and he went following after it. And when he was on the height it was in the hollow, and when he was in the hollow it was on the height, and he never could come up with it; and at last it went out of his sight.

He came then to a wall, and he made a leap over it, and where did he come down but spread-legs on the back of a Mule that was in the field. ‘Are you a good jock?’ says the Mule. ‘I am middling good,’ says he. ‘Hold on so,’ says the Mule, ‘and I will bring you to the place where the bird is.’ There was a wall in front of them—a double wall—and the Mule faced it, and went over it with one leap, and the Fool on his back. ‘You are the best jock ever I saw,’ says the Mule. ‘You are the best Mule ever I saw,’ says the Fool. They went on then as far as they could through the course of the day, till the Mule said: ‘I’m hungry now; go get me a few grains of oats.’ ‘How can I do that,’ says the Fool, ‘when I have no money?’ ‘Go in there to that inn and get it for me, as I told you,’ says the Mule. ‘How much will do you?’ says he. ‘Seven stone,’ says the Mule. So they stopped at the inn, and the Fool put him into the stable and bade the innkeeper to give him seven stone of oats. ‘Go in now and get your own dinner,’ says the Mule. So he went in and he got his dinner; and when he was ready to go, the innkeeper asked for the money. ‘I have none,’ says he. ‘Well, I will keep the Mule in the stable till such time as you can pay me,’ says the innkeeper, and he went out and was going to lock the stable door, and the Mule gave a kick that broke his leg, and there he was lying on the ground. ‘Come on now,’ says the Mule; and the Fool got up on his back, and away with them again, and they came to a wall that was five miles in height. ‘At it now,’ says the Fool, and the Mule faced at it and crossed it with one leap. ‘You are a jock that can’t be beat,’ says the Mule. ‘You are a Mule that can’t be beat,’ says the Fool.

There was before them a lake that was five miles in length and five miles in breadth. ‘I am thirsty now,’ says the Mule, ‘after that feed I had. And I’ll stop now till I’ll take a drink,’ he says. ‘Do not,’ says the Fool, ‘or you will be heavy and not able to go.’ ‘Wait till you see that,’ says the Mule. So he stopped and he began to drink, and he never stopped till he had drunk up the whole of the lake that was five miles in length and five miles in breadth. They went on again till they came to a mountain that was before them, and the whole of the mountain was in one blaze, and there was a high wall before it, fifteen feet high. ‘Hold on now,’ says the Mule. ‘Here, at it,’ says the Fool, and the Mule crossed it with one leap; and when he came where the blaze was, he let out of his mouth all the water of the lake he had swallowed, and it quenched the blaze, and there they saw before them the bird. But if they did it went under ground, and the Mule followed it under ground into the enchanted place where it lived; and when they got there, it was not a bird, but the finest young lady that could be seen, and a King’s daughter. The Fool asked her then to come along with him till he would marry her. ‘I will not,’ she said, ‘until such time as you will find my father, that I have hidden away from you.’ So he brought the Mule out to the stable, and he didn’t know where to go look for the King. And when they were in the stable the Mule said: ‘The young lady has a hen clutching, and the place where it is clutching is in her own room, under her bed. And under it you will find eleven eggs,’ he said, ‘and one of them is yellow and spotted. And take that one in your hand, and be going to smash it against the floor, and the King that is inside of it will cry out and will ask you to spare his life.’ So he went looking for the hen, and all happened as the Mule had said. ‘Will you marry me now?’ says he to the young lady. ‘I will not,’ says she, ‘till you find my father that I have hidden a second time.’ So the place where she hid her father that time was in a duck’s bill, and she put the duck out swimming in the middle of a pond. The young man went then to the stable and asked the Mule did he know where the King was hidden, and the Mule told him it was in the duck’s bill. ‘And look at my tail,’ he said, ‘and see is there e’er a grey rib in it.’ So he looked, and there was a grey rib. ‘Pull it out,’ says the Mule, ‘and bring it to the pond where the duck is, and throw it out over the water, and however far the duck is, that rib will bring it back to the land. And catch a hold of it then, and threaten to cut the neck of it, and the King will cry out from its bill and ask you to spare him.’ So he did all that, and he spared the King, and then he went to the King’s daughter. ‘Will you marry me this time?’ says he. ‘I will not,’ says she, ‘till you find my father the third time.’ The place she hid him the third time was in a block of wood, and the Mule said to the young man: ‘Take a nail out from my shoe and drive it into the block of wood till you will split it.’ So he drew the nail, and he put it on the block of wood, and was going to split it, and the King called out for mercy, and he spared him.

After that he married the young lady, and himself and herself and the old King lived together, and there never were three people happier. And the Mule said: ‘Where will I go now?’ ‘Go back,’ says the Fool, ‘to your own place, for you know the way well to it. But come back here at the end of seven years,’ he said, ‘till you’ll see how am I getting on.’ So at the end of the seven years the Mule came back, and he asked to be taken into service. ‘I will never make a servant of you,’ says the Fool, ‘when I remember all the things you did for me, and all you helped me.’ ‘If that is so,’ says the Mule, ‘go and root up that little bush you see beyond, and give me three blows with the stump of it.’ So he did that, and with the three blows of the bush the enchantment went from the Mule, and who was he but the young man’s own father, the King that was thought to be dead. So they all four lived together then and ever since, and the time I saw them myself they were well and happy and having great riches.

------------------------------------------------------------------------